Okay, I've spent my day baking cookies....hanging garland....inflating eeyore and tiger and pooh in the front yard. I've dawned my reindeer antlers and even turned on Christmas tunes. Aren't ya proud of me yet?
As most of you know, I've found the holidays challenging for some time. This year will be exceptionally hard. My kids have always enjoyed going over to my mom's and helping her decorate for the holidays. We ended up with a lot of the decorations from Mom's house and so I'm immersed and surrounded by all the "familiar" things that remind me of this time of year and Mom. I'm trying very hard to be the parent who puts her kids first. They need me to try to ease some of the sadness they feel this year...having to do the holiday without Grandma...without being surrounded by all the extended family. There will be no trips to Colorado this year....no big family meals surrounded by aunts and uncles, cousins and friends....and the hardest thing of all is no Grandma....the woman they loved and adored who really loved this time of year.
So, I will put on my happy face....keep my reindeer antlers on a little crooked and crank up Elvis and Sinatra....Como....and George Strait...(If I'm going to listen to Christmas carols they should at least by people I enjoy listening to)....and I will even go to candlelight Christmas eve service....and maybe this Christmas which will be filled with so many tears just might not be quite the time of loss that it feels like at this moment...at least not for the people most important to me...my kids.
Jingling my bells....
XoXo
Pandora
1 comment:
You are an inpiration. The kids will have a good time because you will make sure they do. Maybe you will find some cheer in their joy. Plus, Christmas music is always fun and addicting. That is why I am humming Christmas songs in July.
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